Capricorn + Pisces Ascendant: You are certainly not the easiest person in the world to understand, mainly because your nature is so deep and your personality so complicated, that others are somewhat intimidated at the prospect of staring into this abyss. All the same your friendly nature is attractive, and there will always be people around who are fascinated by the sheer magnetic quality that is endemic to the zodiac mix.
Sentimental and extremely kind, there is no limit to the extent of your efforts on behalf of a deserving world, though there are some people around who wonder about your commitment and who may ridicule you a little for your staying power, even in the face of some adversity. At work you are very capable, will work long and hard, and can definitely expect a greater degree of financial and practical success than Pisces alone. Routines don’t bother you too much, though you do need regular periods of introspection, which help to recharge low batteries and a battered self esteem.
In affairs of the heart you are somewhat given to impulse, which belies the more careful qualities of Capricorn. However, the determination remains intact and you are quite capable of chasing rainbows around, never realising that you can’t get to the end of them. You are immensely lovable and a great favourite to many. (Capricorn – Your personal horoscope 2009, Igloo Books)
When I have things I don’t understand, or when I’m confused with a decision I turn to astrology. More often than not, if the advice can relate to my issue then I will take it, regardless of how stupid I know that may be. But I believe in fate, and if I came across this sentence telling me what to do then it was my destiny to read it, so I don’t regret it.
I do believe there is a plan and life is showing me the way. If I say something, and the person for some reason doesn’t get the message I’ll pretend I said nothing, because maybe it was a secret or a thought I wasn’t supposed to tell. I follow my intuition a lot, it’s a feeling in my gut that I get when I’m on the right track. But even though it starts in your gut, it works its way somehow to your heart and it almost makes you want to cry. Its easy to ignore but you can learn to recognise it.
This may sound wacky but I do think that I’m kind of in tune with something, I know things I shouldn’t know. When I was 5, I knew my grandmother had died without having been told. I didn’t even know she was sick, and my father and brother who were supposed to tell me got really spooked about it.
My feelings are usually on the mark. The day I fought with my old best friend I had a bad gut churning feeling of dread the whole day, without reason why. I was to see her at 7pm and deep down I did not want to go one bit. It turned out that she and some of the others had all betrayed me, and I stormed out of her house without even saying goodbye to her mother. I was so upset that day that I wanted to die.
“Did you know when you go its the perfect ending
To the bad day I was just beginning
When you go all I know is you’re my favourite mistake..
Maybe nothing lasts forever
Even when you stay together
I don’t need forever after, but its your laughter won’t let me go
So I’m holding on this way..”
I predicted through tarot the relationships of my sister, including her current long term relationship with the man she will probably marry. I predicted a conflict between a guy I barely knew and his mates, using playing cards kind of mucking around, but was uncannily correct. The only thing that messes with my head with tarot, is predicting my own life story. I get confused and it doesn’t seem clear. But apparently thats supposed to happen when you read for yourself.
I’ve been a mess lately, the last six months anyway. I can’t concentrate, I’m slipping with uni, I can’t get motivated. All this friendship bullshit kinda just knocked the wind right out of me. I’ve lost my direction, and once where I knew I would succeed in my path, now I just see failure. When people would tell me my ambitions were too unreasonable I would laugh at them underestimating me.
Lately though, their words have stung. I feel like a bad person that doesn’t deserve to succeed. I want to get along with people and be cheerful, but then I think, does that make me fake? Or does it make me insincere? Because I want to be cheery but deep down I’m not. And I hate fakeness, I’ve always tried to keep it as real as possible. But am I all just one big act? I feel like I’ve lost myself. I have these big ideas and all these morals but its like I can’t uphold them or do them justice.
Well I read my cards. They are hopeful. They give me something to think about at least, but I always feel like I muddle up the messages meant for me. With myself, I can’t tell if I’m on the right track. It could be so blatant, and I would be oblivious. If anyone else reads, and can see a deeper or clearer meaning please let me know. Here are my cards, I did a 6 card cross spread.
Past Influence – High Priestess, secret holder, holding all knowledge, can mean the reader (myself) because its about spiritual and intuitive knowledge like a tarot reader holds, seems to be the querent (also myself), knowing things but keeping them hidden. Time of solitude and research, finding your way.
Obstacles in my path – Knight of Pentacles, can mean travel as knights ride horses, pentacles is travel on foot, pentacles mean money and ambition, a knight can refer to a young man, teen or of teen maturity, a hardworking practical man, solid and dependable. So, hmm.. He has dark features, physically.
Working in my favour – 9 of cups. This one was reversed, I don’t know how significant that can be. Nine of cups is a wish coming true, something you wanted finally granted. Popularity, good relationships, creativity. Cups are love. But reversed can mean vanity, carelessness, over sensitivity, neglecting partners. How can that help me?
Short term future – King of Pentacles, kings are beginnings, ideas and starting the ball rolling. They give the push to everything, without them nothing would happen. Pentacles is work/money so this can mean a new business or career. They can also obviously mean a man, physically dark, who holds responsibility. Practical, leader, shrewd, successful, proud, aloof but charismatic.
Long term future – The World, this was also reversed. The world means completeness, the end of the journey, success and praise for it. Can indicate travel. Reversed it means lack of vision, something holding me back from success, perhaps my own insecurity. Attachment to something I need to let go of to succeed.
Final outcome – King of Cups, kings are the driving force that lead the way, cups mean love so this can be a start to a relationship, a proposal of marriage, a new love, a man wanting to better himself, the king of cups as a person is family orientated, loyal to the death, old fashioned and compassionate. He has a good complexion with clear eyes.
I just can’t see the meaning, it seems like there are 3 men here? There is definitely a very confused querent. If anyone can connect the dots, please do. I’m out.